Prerequisite Parenthood Planning

My friend is expecting a baby, and he taught me a lot about project planning.

“Building a prerequisite tree together” said Sam, “is the best recommendation I can make to any soon-to-be parents”.

I stared at Sam quizzically as he unwrapped a dog-eared piece of paper from his pocket.

“You see, both my wife and I want a safe and fulfilling family environment. But my wife wanted us to redecorate the bedroom and nursery, whilst I thought they are fine just as they are. She also wanted us empty the garage. I just couldn’t understand why any of this was necessary.”

Sam’s Prerequisite Tree

Sam’s index finger worked his way down the tatty piece of paper as he explained: “So one day I took her out for coffee, and introduced her to the idea of a prerequisite tree. We wrote our shared goal at the top - create a safe and fulfilling family environment - and then connected it to all the conditions that must be true for that goal to be realised. We then iteratively worked our way down until we chose specific actions to bring about those conditions, and therefore to realise our shared goal.”

“But one of the most important parts to this diagram is stating why you feel a prequisite is necessary.”

Sam’s finger centred on a single statement that connected “Be happy parents” to “Have bedrooms in which we feel comfortable” and read “Because I will spend a lot of time in these rooms as a parent”. Sam spoke up, “You know, when she said this, it just clicked: in order to be happy parents, we do need rooms in which we feel comfortable if we’ll be spending a lot of time in them.”

Sam’s finger passed to another statement, which read “Because we must remove trip hazards.”

Sam continued, “And this is why she wanted clean out the garage, so we had room to store all the bric-a-brac that would otherwise be trip hazards in the home. My wife managed to identify parts of our plan that I would never have thought of.”

“We’re now creating a prerequisite tree for our goal of being parents of a happy and self-sufficient kid. We want to identify the conditions we need to create for our baby Bilbo, and check if my wife and I have the same assumptions about about parenting itself.”

The takeaway? By exposing our assumptions, a prerequisite tree can help build shared agreement on just the few things necessary to reach a goal. But it won’t help you better name your kids.